The Aftermath
by GravityNeko
Summary: Luke deals with the aftermath of his wife's death.
1. Grief

**A/N: Okay, I had this idea for a a day, but Jedi-lover's recent viggie pushed me into actually writing 's kind of depressing but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.**

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Luke sat in the solitary confines of his apartment in the Jedi Temple.

He wasn't sure why he was there; everything surrounding him reminded him of his beloved Mara. Here he could almost smell her faint perfume, could see her as she gracefully danced; hear her as she slept soundly in the bed next him.

A datapad and a half-drunk glass of water remained on the bedside stand on her side. Her favorite pair of boots were placed beside their bedroom door in an orderly fashion. On the vanity, in the far corner of the room, his wife's hair brush was laid. A keepsake box he'd given her on their tenth wedding anniversary, held various jewelry items and trinkets he'd also given to her over the years. ..

His throat locked up at the thought of her and he could feel this raw ache in his heart.

It felt as if someone had jammed a hand into his chest and had gripped his heart all the while twisting it. He felt like it was torn to shreds and could almost feel himself bleeding out as it tried to pump in its natural rhythm.

Almost as if he was dying. It felt like it anyhow, he had been deprived of the other half of his heart, the other half of soul, the other half of himself. Of course he felt like he did. His beloved wife was gone and she had taken that part of him with her.

He let out a wrenched sob, squeezing his hand into a tight fist. By now, he had screamed his throat raw in his anguish and his river of tears had dried out on him. Yet his grief continued on even without those tears, it continued to rip and tear at him and drain him.

War was never fair and the Force gave no explanation for its mysterious ways—but he couldn't for once accept the unfairness of the whole kriffin' scenario.

His wife was gone forever, and no explanation would be given that he would—or could—accept. He couldn't accept that his wife and been so cruelly wrenched from him. He wouldn't!

No, this was something no one could fix. A broken heart like his couldn't be mended so easily. He feared he would have to live with this for the rest of his life.

"You know what the worst part is, Mara…" He said bitterly. "If I had trusted you….none of this would have happened."

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**Well, that's it...woo...hold on I'll be back. lol**


	2. Apology

**A/N: An idea I'd always had, but didn't occur until later. Fetkkat's latest drabble encouraged it.**

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Ben leaned on the balcony outside of his parent's room, looking out over the cityscape. He sighed heavily and flicked another piece of gravel off the railing.

Luke stood in the doorway, watching the boy until he felt the moments was proper.

"Dad, I know you're there." The young boy muttered.

His father cleared his throat. "Yes, I suppose you do." He walked forward to join Ben.

When his father came to stop beside him, Ben asked, "What is it?"

"Excuse me?"

"Dad…" He drew the title out. "You want something, I can feel it." Ben shifted his eyes in his father's direction. "Just say it."

Luke smiled. "I guess you know me pretty well."

His voice was upbeat. "I'd like to think so. I mean, I am your son right? Plus, someone's gotta watch your back now that Mom' ….gone." The sparkle faded from his eyes, and his face fell. "You're…" He faltered again. "…kind of hopeless without me." Ben was trying to make himself jovial, but Luke could see the inner hurt.

A lump formed in his throat"You needn't feel like you had to do that, Son."

"I don't mind."

"No, Ben. I'm the parent. I'm the one that should have been looking out for you; guiding you. And I failed in that respect." He put his hands on Ben's shoulder and turned the teen to him. "Ben, look at me."

The youth looked up, trying to hide the tears that were in his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

Ben went to open his mouth, but a quick shake of his father's head silenced him.

"I should have been there for you, Ben; through all of this. Not only the finding your mother, but having to deal with her death. You bore a great burden no child should, and you shouldn't have had to do that alone. I should have been there to comfort you. But I was so mired in my own grief that I didn't see the pain you were in, and for that reason I'm sorry, son.

"No," Ben said, tears suddenly in his eyes. "You're a good dad. You may not think too much of yourself right but you've always been a great dad to me. Mom was your wife; you had a right to be hurting. I understood that. I never resented you for it."

He took a breath. "And for the record, If I ever did anything wrong in my life or stupid or reckless, it was _never_ because of you. You always did your best with me. The best you knew how. You're a pretty astral person, Dad. You did put up with me. That's got to be worth something, right?" He gave a small grin.

Luke sank to the floor of the balcony.

"Dad?"

"You always did have your mother's candor."

He looked up into his son's crystal clear light blue eyes that now looked darker in the nighttime. Yes, he may have lost his wife, but he had part of Mara that would live on. He had their son.

And though his heart may have been broken, it wasn't gone entirely.

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End file.
